don't blame me if you life goes down the crapper, so to speak.

Sometimes, I wish I was five again.
I wish everything was simple. Why does life get so trivial as we age?
A few months ago, October, although it feels like longer,
I made the decision to break off a relationship… well, no…
I decided to break off the concept of a relationship.
It was a to-be relationship that is never going to be.
Although many people openly argued (loudly) that “it should be more“, I created a mental roadblock.
You see, I firmly believe high school is like…potty training for life.
You probably don’t remember being potty trained, so let me remind you of what happened.
You were two years old and wearing a diaper. Life was going swimmingly and you were happy as a clam.
Then one day, for absolutely no logical reason, your parents became obsessed with having you use the toilet. At first you didn’t understand what the big deal was about. Then you started to understand - and you immediately rebelled. Finally, because your parents were stronger, and because you needed them for all sorts of stuff, you complied and learned to use the toilet.
After that, things weren’t so bad. Your parents were thrilled, and you felt pretty good, too.
In fact, it was hard to believe you ever used a diaper in the first place.
That’s what I mean when I say high school is potty training for life.
Only, the toilet is college. (I say that only in the most positive way.)
College is where we’re supposed to go.
Just like the toilet.
And when we do it, it makes our parents happy, and is good for us too
(more job possibilities and no more diaper rash!).
So back to the poor boy and my mental roadblock, Since to me high school
is no more than a peculiar intermediate step towards real life, just like toilet training,
I would never think of getting into anything serious during it.
Well, no, it’s more I guess, that although I had this great boy who fit the criteria of a fully functioning boyfriend and all, I will, in roughly 8 months, be going to college in some faraway place.
And when I do, high school and everything in it will disappear and be forever forgotten.
Just like my diaper and, I assume, this boy.

…You know what I’ve always wondered,?
Why our world is governed by rules.
Our lives are filled with them.
From the moment we wake up we follow them;
We wash.
We dress.
We don’t kill the first person we see.
We go to school.
We attend classes (usually).
We sit.
We listen.
And yet, the very rules we learn often contradict each other entirely.
For instance, we learn in English that i comes before e, except after c.
And what immediately breaks that rule?
Science.