18

Can't sleep.
So far the best gift I've gotten BY FAR (all of them were fab, I swear) is Michelle's.

She made a flippin BOOK 12 pages long of the most amazing things ever.

She wrote me a letter and then made lists of 18's;

• 18 words to describe Mollydoll
• 18 reasons why Molly Woodford is my best friend
• 18 memorable moments
• 18 jokes
• 18 quotable quotes
• 18 flavors of ice cream to try [footnote: to try these flavors, please book a trip to vancouver with Michelle to go to the La Casa Gelato Shop. (maybe we'll bring Tyler; he likes to dance)]
• 18 things to do this year [apparently a true best friend gives you goals. My favorites are "fight Mike Anderson for shotgun" (scary thought... he throws punches) and "Hug a stranger (kiss him if he's cute and indeed a boy)" Oh Michelle.]
• 18 random nicknames (about 13 of which she has indeed used on me)
  
  

In conclusion; Michelle apparently likes to make me cry AND is the most amazing thing on the planet.

(For reference, I happen to spend the majority of my time in cars with Michelle and Michael Anderson, but I have NEVER fought him for shotgun. I value my life. Apparently 'Chelle does not.)

I think that we've got what it takes to get this heart to start beating again

Happy Birthday To Me
Happy Birthday To Me
Happy Birthday Dear Mollyyyyy
Happy Birthday To Me

So I'm officially 18.
My favourite thing so far was at 12am Pearlanne coming online and saying "ADULT LEADER!"
(She was the one who helped me pout during the leader meeting because I was the only 17 yr old left)
I guess I kind of still wish that my mom was here or something, but I'm just as happy with all the amazing people in my life right now.

Oooh, I got another ECARD (Count: 21)
Katelyn, Carlye and Michelle should be here soon.

lovelove!

So it is officially my birthday in 2 minutes.
I had dinner with my dad tonight and it was really really... fun.
I miss my dad a lot, but I don't know what that means exactly.
I'm pretty sure that leaving didn't make the missing family syndrome improve all that much,
and it just makes my birthday even lonelier.
I miss holiday traditions... I miss my mom's birthday breakfast.
I want my life to make sense.

Cordell, a kid from my XLR8 session, said something that really seemed profound to me.

"good night molly and happy birthday.
godbless you many miracles and may god grant you your greatest wish. Let Yahweh shine through you!"

It got me to thinking about what I really want for my birthday.
I miss my mom and I miss my family and I miss a life that made sense.
I could do the noble thing and wish for world peace or an end to world hunger...
but would that REALLY make me feel less like a useless, unwanted being?
Probably not.

Happy Birthday to me.

Senior Youth Councils - 2 Days

I can't wait to get out of this stupid town for a few days.