Where are you? I can hear your words resounding

-|-Mollay-|- A promise or a dare, I'd jump if I knew you'd catch me says:
im kinda nervous about xlr8
-|-Mollay-|- A promise or a dare, I'd jump if I knew you'd catch me says:
what if no one likes me
-|-Mollay-|- A promise or a dare, I'd jump if I knew you'd catch me says:
people usually dont
Michelle says:
people usually do
Michelle says:
plus you have josh there
Michelle says:
and he's the odd MAN out lawl!
-|-Mollay-|- A promise or a dare, I'd jump if I knew you'd catch me says:
yeah but all his friends are there too!
I have Katelyn and she's def a great bestfriend
but our friendship is fleeting sometimes, and she knows EVERYONE
I know... Kate, Vanessa and Josh
I'm over analyzing everything, aren't I?
Michelle says:
yes
_____________________________________-

Kay, so I know I overanalyze things.
Not as much as Michelle herself, however, but still... I do it.
I overthink and overstress... but my theory is, it's better than understressing and underthinking and then being underprepared.
It's official... I'm such a disaster.
Oh well, I'm so blessed to have my friends here for me... well, except Caitlyn.
I don't know what I'm going to do when she leaves on Thursday.
She'll be gone til Christmas and I'll have this gaping hole.
I know that she's welcomed me into her family and made my life wonderful, but that doesn't mean things wont feel treacherous without her.
Who will I watch the office obsessively with?
Who will I gaze loving at Ben Harrison with?
Who will I make fun of Chelsea Spence with???
Oh dear, everything is in turmoil.
At least I stll have Michelle.
I'll just make sure she's always over here.
Her and Mike and Tyler already promised they'd still come over when Caitlyn's gone...
so I'm defs counting on that.
Well, I'm a strong person, so I know I can get through this... it's just the first step that I have to get over right?

In other news, the book we have to read for XLR8 says in one part that we have to write down 3 things we want to accomplish. I prayed about them a lot and these are the 3 I got.
2 of which being very scary and out of character.
- Go on a missions Trip
- Start a bible study (on top of the one Ty wants to start) and mentor new girls in the Youth Group
- Write and preach a sermon in front of the church

It's not the missions trip that scares me. It's the other two.
I'm not a shy person, although I seem to be getting moreso as time wears on... I think it has to do with everything that went on with my dad somehow, but I never USED to be a shy person... but either way I'm friendly and warm to new people for the most part. I embraced a lot of the new girls in the church and I know I have the relationships with them to start this... I'm just not the leadership type. I know I have the potential to be... but I usually don't have to be. Caitlyn or Carlye take care of that. Everyone looks up to Caitlyn, and Carlye LOVES to be in control.
I guess the same thing goes for the sermon thing. Who would want to hear what I have to say? I'm not Caitlyn... I'm not Jenna. I'm not... any of that.

Well, on that pessimistic anti-egotistical note, I think I'll be going to bed now.
Grace