So I'm feeling better than I've been feeling the past few days, but I suppose that wasn't exactly public knowledge. On top of being physically ill since I got back from Vancouver, I've been feeling like a pretty big failure, waste of space... whatever you call it, I felt it. Now I know that I am God's child and I am a part of the body and needed and etcetera, and I'm confident in that, trust me. It seems like the issue was outside of me; not a spirit thing. The book we're reading for XLR8 says that EVERYTHING should be a spirit thing, so I guess that's my problem, if I'm living solely through my spirit; through the spirit, nothing outside of it should affect me. At least, that's what the book told me. Or maybe the reason it is bothering me is because all is not right with my soul. Who knows.
That's a rhetorical question with an obvious answer, so I don't want 16 emails telling me something I am already fully aware of. The point is, that feeling is gone. Or if it isn't, it's lessened substantially. I went out with Kellie tonight and we had a good chat. Actually, it was a pretty ordinary insignificant chat... but it was conversation, and I guess it's all I needed. My life is such a bore lately, but at least I've been able to see my friends more than I had been able to in the past few weeks. I went out for breakfast this morning with Michelle, which was fun. We decided we were too young and hip to be Ladies who Lunch, and it was only 10:30am, so we're officially the Babes who Brunch. Classy, eh? Tomorrow I'm possibly getting together with Ben, and Carlye is sleeping over, because we make eachother love life (and I'm the only one that listens to her rant about her amazing boyfriend for 6 hours).
Tonight Michelle, Tyler and I watched Reign Over Me.
It's about this guy that runs into his old college roommate, whose wife and 3 daughters died in the 9/11 plane crash. He denies it ever happened and doesn't actually remember anything from that part of his life. It's depressing, although I don't know how it ends because Michelle had to get the car home by 10.
I suppose that's all.
PEACE
ps. Tyler told me on the phone tonight that if the movie didn't make me cry, I was cold-blooded. I asked him if that meant I was a a reptile. He said that yes, it definitely did.
Long story short, I am now a Caribbean gecko.
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